A physician who comes periodically to the pool of Bethesda hopes to be the first in the water and healed of his melancholy when an angel appears and troubles the water. Everybody at the pool also hopes to be the first in the water and thereby healed of his malady. The angel appears but blocks the physician at the moment he is ready to step into the pool and be healed.
Angel: "Draw back, physician, this moment is not for you." Physician: "Angelic visitor, I pray thee, listen to my prayer. Angel: "Healing is not for you." Physician: "Surely, surely, the angels are wise. Surely, O Prince, you are not deceived by my apparent wholeness. Your eyes can see the nets in which my wings are caught; the sin into which all my endeavors sink half-performed cannot be concealed from you." Angel: "I know." Physician: "Oh, in such an hour was I born, and doubly fearful to me is the flaw in my heart. Must I drag my shame, Prince and Singer, all my days more bowed than my neighbor?"
Angel: "Without your wound where would your power be? It is your very remorse that makes your low voice tremble into the hearts of men. The very angels themselves cannot persuade the wretched and blundering children on earth as can one human being broken on the wheels of living. In Love’s service only the wounded soldiers can serve. Draw back."
Later, the person who enters the pool first and was healed rejoices in his good fortune then turns to the physician before leaving and said: "But come with me first, an hour only, to my home. My son is lost in dark thoughts. I -- I do not understand him, and only you have ever lifted his mood. Only an hour . . . my daughter, since her child has died, sits in the shadow. She will not listen to us butshe will listen to you."
-Thorton Wilder
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Human nature often covets stillness and ease, a place of deep repose where we can drift peaceably,undisturbed .We all, myself included, crave that delicious steadfastness that proves to be ever elusive, but God often seems to have other plans. We feel burdened by inequity, smothered by the crosses we have to bear. We turn to the heavens and seek divine release, praying for nothing other than to be made whole, or wholly untroubled, all the while grossly underestimating the virtue of our pain. As the angel in this tale states,“Without your wound where would your power be?" It's true that none are, or ever will be, able to see through God's eyes and that we are not all created to be heroes or martyrs. But that appears to be beside the point. What if we, rather than fleeing from whatever ails us, employed a degree of honestly and a measure of kindness and used the insight our wounds have bestowed to heal others and deepen ourselves in the process? What a beautiful way to embrace generosity and grace. And strangely enough, I suspect this would offer us all some small measure of the very peace we seek.
I'm officially married! I had the romantic,beautiful wedding of my dreams. Even a cold,rainy Chicago day couldn't destroy it-we moved the ceremony inside and lit up the archway! My dad almost cried,Steph and Jan definitely did cry, and I smiled like a dang fool :)
Today was Daniel and I's 3 year anniversary!I asked him to take me to the Chicago Botanical Gardens and it was incredibly beautiful. In particular,I loved the English Walled,Japanese,and Waterfall Gardens. They were having a Pepper Festival this weekend so we sampled popcorn with various pepper flavored spices and other random yummy treats like biscotti and fresh honey. Overall a romantic and lovely anniversary.
